I was up at dawn, setting up for E’s birthday.  I try to make up as best I can for all the losses and abandonment by her entire family.  It’s both a happy and sad day, because it’s also my son’s final anniversary.  I feel heartbroken for him and his family, which includes me.  Not a day to celebrate entirely, but we must live on and adapt, and weigh new paths carefully, so that everyone involved is served, not lost in the shuffle.  Some difficult decisions ahead for all of us.