Two years ago, on the cusp of summer and fall, I moved to MO.  It feels longer.  So much has happened between 2022 and ’24.  To summarize: I finally got where I needed to be, in every way that counts.  The rest is just details.

I got to see the deranged blowup hitler clown get punctured and start to deflate!  Prez Biden’s bowing out and passing the torch to Harris/Walz at the exact moment needed was his greatest heroic act as a leader/servant.  I’m thankful I got to live to see this moment.

Missourians rose up in outrage at Repugs’ criminal human rights violations and fought back.  Reproductive and other rights are back on the table.  Progressive Black and Queer/ally dems are on the ticket up and down the ballot.  There may be hope for this state after all.

The Queer/Black communities here in STL city and county are strong, visible, and actively working to make this a more inclusive, egalitarian environment, especially for children coming up.  So much so, that sometimes I forget there’s a whole hostile red state surrounding us, and people who still don’t get it.  I feel privileged to live in a place that reflects the diversity that will one day predominate.

I’m happy to live in a lower income apartment where I’m in the minority.  Just across the metaphorical tracks, there are at least some people of color, and every other house has BLM/LGBTQ+/dem signs and flags.  The revolving door of friends at Avdi’s reflects this welcoming community atmosphere.  It’s like an oasis, but with real life issues being dealt with.

Most of all, I’m thankful to live near my son and gkids and get to see them evolve and grow, even with all the complex issues and growing pains.  It’s always a dynamic, never static, state of affairs, where I’m constantly challenged to adapt and keep up.  Sometimes I find myself in long conversations with one of the kids, that I didn’t see coming, and it’s like a revelation.  I learn something new every day.  I try not to be part of Avdi’s overload of responsibility, but part of the solution.

I’m dragging more these days, exhausted before I even begin, always feeling inadequate.  But underneath it all, knowing I’m where I need to be keeps me going and growing.

This latest heat wave (at one point the heat index may have been 112!) just keeps extending, so I just keep plowing through it.  Or hoeing, would be more accurate.  I planted another section of veg garden with more greens, or I should say reds–red mustard, red cabbage, and red/rainbow beets.  It should be very colorful, if nothing else.  I relocate cardboard (for keeping weeds down) as I go.  In general, my goal is to clean up and improve Avdi’s surroundings, one area at a time, as long as I can keep going.

Sometimes as I’m working, hummingbirds come right up to me and hover, looking at me for a long moment.  Those are the moments that make it all worthwhile, watching wildlife like chipmunks, goldfinches, and many other bird and butterfly species being drawn to the food and shelter provisions in the landscape, and feeling at home.  Not to mention humans!

Here’s my new trick–I can actually sleep at Avdi’s now.  Tuesday I not only took a long nap there (!?) but then slept through the night (once I finally got to sleep).  Then I go home and sleep some more!  But I make myself get up and keep living.  Coffee is my latest favorite drink.

Avdi and friend  got to go to a Cards baseball game!  They lost to the SD Padres, but the humongous hot dogs (piled with glop, STL-style, naturally) and local craft beers were memorable.  They have a whole ballpark village filled with international foods, drinks, and concessions.  If the Orioles come to town, it will be my turn!

Meanwhile, between sleeps, I got more gardening projects done or started.  I planted more salad and greens, created a little flower and herb garden for S, cleaned up E and Y’s small flower plots, reseeded E’s with shade herbs, planted more cilantro in the herb garden, and harvested okra and tomatoes.  I’m working on clearing an area by the perennial veggies (asparagus, horseradish, prickly pear) to eventually be a permanent strawberry bed.

S’s friend J has been coming by regularly after school, and is becoming part of our revolving extended family.  Even when S is out or ignoring him, he likes to get involved and be helpful.  Our resident chef E showed him how to help make brownies (which were delectable, as always).

Of course I continue to do a lot of housework and little projects behind the scenes.  I’m still not as proficient as Avdi would like at certain tasks, but often E can step in and take over.  I am getting better at mixology!  An essential survival skill.

Yesterday was too hot for me to do much outside, while Avdi, E, and even Y found it a perfect time to work out in the hot garage.  It got me to thinking, as climate change heats up the world and makes weather extremes more common, only the young and stronger humans who have been born into it or learn to adapt will survive.  Those of us who can’t hack it will die out.  Eventually, even the fittest won’t make it, if the wrong politicians (i.e. trump and co.) have their way.

As it is, it would take extreme measures, applied yesterday, to even slow down climate change at this point.  Most of us know this theoretically, but just step outside and look around at the world, and it’s literally at our doorsteps.  In some cases, submerging entire homes and coastlines.  (Remind me again why people still stupidly retire to Florida?  Natural selection?)

Anyway, that’s my unoriginal thought of the day.

It got really hot again, but it can’t fool me, or keep me down.  I’m on to you, MO.

I stayed over Sat. night through Sunday, so Avdi could go out.  Once I finally did get to sleep, I actually mostly stayed asleep, which is unusual.  Probably due to feeling more at home there.  I’m learning how to chill out and be a fixture, at last.  I can even ignore S and his mishegoss, for the most part.  E is very skilled at diffusing potential volatile situations.

In garden news, I sowed a row of “salad”, did more cleanup, and harvested tomatoes.  I’ll just keep working my way down the garden, doing same, until it’s a whole new fall/winter garden.  The actual goal is to use up all the old seeds from yesteryears, and start over fresh.  Kind of like one of my metaphors.

I even overcame some of my mechanical phobia, and did much-overdue fixit stuff in the downstairs bathroom.  Maybe some jerry-rigging was involved.  But once again we have a functional TP holder, towel rack, and wall hooks.  Also, the toilet seat no longer tries to fall off.  Skibidi.  I feel so useful.

In case you think I’m just a boring, uninformed old grandma, I’m back to following the latest political news and commentary, since there now seems to be some hope for us again.  I never get complacent, but it’s energizing to not feel despair every day.  Instead of a deranged psycho fascist, we may have a chance at intelligent, sentient beings serving us actual people, and restoring some justice and human rights.  Harris/Walz!

Now back to boring grandma stuff.

You’ll have to trust me on my Shabbat meal turning out nicely, because I was so out of it, I forgot to take photos!  I made a beautiful fresh fruit salad, herbed roasted potatoes, peppers, and onions that all came from the garden, and steaks (that didn’t).  Of course the challah was the favorite, as usual.  S’s friend J joined us for dinner, and enthusiastically enjoyed it.  It was quite a merry gathering.

I was really dragging today–I blame CLL–but dragged myself to A’s anyway to keep up my momentum.  Sleep when we die.  Today I started direct-sewing some fall greens, starting from the front with blue kale and spinach.  I’ll continue to fill up all the empty spaces with other cool weather crops.

Y made dinner tonight–bruschetta!  (The basil was homegrown.)  It was excellent.

I thought I’d try out a fun new gimmick on my photos.  I apologize if any of the info is wrong; it was mostly just to play around with colorful captions.

Yesterday as I was about to cross evil Watson, I witnessed a huge traffic accident right in front of me, and called it in.  It was like in a movie–a car darted out of 7-eleven and smashed into an suv, which flipped over multiple times and landed right-side-up in the middle of the road.  Vehicles were skewed all over the place, blocking the road, or trying to find a way out.

Somehow the elderly couple in the suv survived with minor injuries, and chose not to go to the hospital.  I don’t think the other guy died, but it was a head-on collision, so it couldn’t have ended well.  I stayed with the couple as the emergency teams checked them over.  I think I was almost as in shock as they were.

So much can happen in a split second to change your life, or end it.  I have so much respect for EMTs who respond to emergencies with professionalism and efficiency.

That pretty much set the tone of my day!  Avdi said, “Touch grass”, so I dug up the rest of the potatoes, and watered the garden.  Then I decorated for K’s birthday, and did other housey things.  Avdi took K out for sushi, while I made dinner for the rest of us.  Y and I played in the kitchen.  Later we had cheesecake.  J drove me home and I collapsed.

When I finally got myself to Avdi’s today it was quiet, with all four kids at school.  I think I was having one of my CLL “off” days, where I’m fatigued and lightheaded.  Fortunately, it was gorgeous out, so I got some gardening in.  I cleared the whole potato area, then started digging.  Lots of white and red potatoes!  I left most of it for later, as Y had expressed interest in helping dig.

The kids came home in varying degrees of non-amusement, but mostly their first day went well.  We all hung out talking about it and distracting Avdi, who was trying to work.  Y had fun digging potatoes using the spading fork with bare feet.  E jumped in the pool and then of course started baking some more.

Lately I’ve been feeling much more at home and relaxed over there, probably since the kids and I have gotten to know and trust each other more.  I like listening to them and learning the lingo.

Yesterday was S’s first day at school (the “special” school), and he seems to have survived.  The other kids start their respective schools today.  We’ll see how that goes.

I got more garden cleanup done to where you can actually see the garden for the weeds.  I’ve been laying down cardboard as I go, to keep the weeds down.  I even began the digging of the potatoes, but didn’t get far.  I’m finally starting to get peppers and tomatoes.  E has been harvesting okra and processing it for pickling, and the odd tiny watermelon here and there.

My latest plan is to direct-seed some cool-weather crops for fall as I clean up and harvest the summer veggies.  Keep it productive as long as possible, then eventually add compost and leaf mulch to be tilled in later.  I’ve stopped following gardening manuals for the most part, and just do what seems logical and intuitive.  Something’s bound to work!

Also, in case you haven’t noticed, I’ve dialed down my purist natives-only “religion”, in light of reality.  I still love that I keep discovering more natives in the landscape by not weeding them out, but I’m much more inclusive, as long as no harm is done.